I Am Not Weak Willed
by murphey
Summary: A rewritten history for Elia Martell and the trials and tribulations of marrying into House Targaryen. It's starting off a little short but I aill expand it as the story progresses. Contains a lot of House Martell family and multiple-POV.
1. Chapter 1

_**Prologue**_

* * *

Elia Martell was born too soon. Her lord father Daeron Gargalen held his breath the entire birth, not once opening his eyes from his seat outside the birthing room. He was a fearsome man to behold, but the sounds of his wife giving birth terrified him. The midwives wiped their bloodied hands across their brows and prayed to the mother that she have a quick death.

But the ruling Princess of Dorne knew her daughter would live. She refused to let the Stranger to take this child, not again. She'd fight tooth and nail, she'd wager all of Dorne if it meant her child would live.

And she did.

Eight Years Later

Princess of Dorne

Lady Adrielle narrowed her eyes at the maester who sat before her. The balding man quivered at the princess' chilling gaze and stumbled over his words.

The Princess raised her hand to stop him: "Think carefully about what you utter to me next, maester Ayron, or they may be your last." The man shook his head in exasperation.

"You misunderstand me, my lady. I simply meant the princess will always be in this condition, there is nothing to cure her of it." He finished, and adjusted his gray robes uncomfortably.

Adrielle stood from her chair and desk and walked to the arched balcony overlooking the courtyard. Below her she saw Doran showing something-a book perhaps, or a scroll, to his younger siblings. The look of fascination on their eyes made them look like a painting down there, like someone had concocted the very image in a dream. It was nearly sundown, and everything was on fire in the sand marbled palace.

"Is there nothing we can do to ease any of the symptoms? Make her healthy in any way?" She begged, for she so needed a positive answer.

Perhaps she blamed herself for her daughter's illness. It was her fault her babe was born too early. She has been too stressed and the maester told her to stay in bed for the last moon of the pregnancy. Of she had just _stayed in bed._

And now she had to live with the consequences. Her daughter was born small with weak lungs, and a heart that beat like a hummingbird.

"Well, bleedings could ease some of the symptoms, my lady. She would need a healthy diet and exercise-but nothing strenuous. I suggest treating her like any other child, but with a very watchful eye and monitoring at all times." The maester replied, slightly bolder. He was beginning to sound more confident. Princess Adrielle raised an eyebrow in his direction.

"You will see to this Maester Jordaen, and we will discuss the details with my husband when he arrives from Kings Landing." The maester bowed to her and left with a sweep of a robe. Adrielle closed her eyes in exhaustion.

She tried to feel some sense of hope, that the maester's confidence was a sign that her daughter _really_ would be able to have a normal childhood. Her son's words came to mind as she felt the guilt wash over her.

' _She is beautiful.' Her son cooed over the swaddled babe. Adrielle's heart swelled with love at the sound of awe coming from her son. She has never seen a babe as beautiful as Elia, not since her sweet Doran was born. Her son was her pride and now Elia was her joy._

' _She is weak my boy, but thankfully she will have you to make her strong. A princess needs an older brother.' Daeron murmured next to her. Adrielle closed her eyes too stop the tears from falling in both happiness that her daughter was born-but also fear for the future._

 _Doran furrowed his brows but kept a knowing look in his eyes. He was old enough to understand what it meant for a babe who was born prematurely._

' _She will be strong, I am sure. Nothing will stand in her way as long as I am here.' Her eldest child proclaimed._

The Princess prayed to the Gods his hope was not false.

 **(A/N: I have a lot of OC's of course, like Elia's father. And until their mother is named I gave her a name.)**


	2. Chapter 2

Twelve Years Later

Daughter of the Sun

Elia walked slowly through the streets of the dusty Shadow city next to her mother as they stopped at each stall they came upon. The bazar was filled with the noise of Lyseni shopkeepers and silk traders and women arguing over prices. It smelled of spices and sweet meats and the baking of bread. The hot sun beat down to heavily it made Elia feel lightheaded, but she would not swoon. She tucked her veil a little tighter to shield her eyes from the sun. Her mother on the other hand, wore no veil, and let the sun darken her skin.

They passed a stall filled with dolls and necklaces and something caught Elia's eye. Her mother, not noticing her stopping continued on. Ashara stopped with her and stayed by her side

"Mother, wait." She called and immediately reached for the small snake-shaped bracelet with red ruby eyes. It fit Elia perfectly

"Is it not a perfect?" Elia asked both her mother and Ashara as she tilted the sword toward them. Adrielle Martell cocked her head and smiled as well.

"If only your brother was a girl instead, he would adore it." The Lady snorted and looked at the other baubles and chains of glass.

Elia rolled her eyes at her mother, who was more superficial than the Lady admitted too, "I meant for me, mother."

Adrielle Martell stared at the bracelet momentarily before looking at her daughter's expectant face. She sighed then motioned for the shopkeeper, who flushed at the sight at them, especially Ashara. Elia paid the bronze for the bracelet with much persuasion on her end to actually pay for the item then just accepting it because of who they were.

They passed by other stalls and Elia raised her chin at some Tyroshi man's sneer that looked her up and down as they passed by his silk stand. Many others jeered and shouted supposed flattery to her and Ashara, and even her mother. They were all silenced by a look of their guards. Elia Martell walked among many vipers in this city, and none would dare strike her.

When the sun began to set behind the tower her mother decided to move the litter inside and drew the day to a close. Ashara had her arm hooked into Elia's as they walked slowly up through the Threefold Gate, the main entrance to the their home from the streets of the Shadow. Elia wished deeply in her soul that her life would always be like this. Covered in the smells of Sunspear and drenched in silks and Myrish lace, with the jingle of bells around her ankle. The coolness of her new bracelet kept her calm and at peace with herself.

Unfortunately for her, the Gods had a different story in mind or her.

A fortnight after their shopping trip, Elia's lady mother Adrielle received a letter sealed with a three headed dragon the color of the Stranger himself. She immediately called the entire family in the read aloud the words that would change her life forever.

Oberyn had been the first to announce that their mother was a mad as the king himself, which earned a sharp reply from both their mother and their father. Then Doran, the wiser and more methodical of the three of them announced that _he_ would never make as wild of a decision as that, even though he was the one who married without mother's consent.

Oberyn had already killed a man once before and, their mother never uttered a word about it. It was a fair death, but still. She never discussed it.

And she chose now to show her children how truly mad she really was?

They argued most of the night. _But was it really an argument?_ Elia thought to herself. The entire moment felt as if it had happened in a blur.

Adrielle Martell was as stubborn as any Lady of Dorne should be. Oberyn and Elia were both the evidence of that. In the end even the pleadings of even both Ashara and Mellario alike could force no hole in her mother's decision. Even Daeron, her father could not persuade her otherwise.

Elia felt the fight suddenly drain from her and was washed anew with a sudden realization.

She would be queen someday. Her children would sit on the iron throne with a Dornish mother and Dornish influence.

Her mother was smarter than any maester or scholar had ever existed.

Elia rose slowly, which caught the attention of her family and they silenced their arguing.

"I accept" she announced with a raised chin. Her mother made a noise of satisfaction and clasped her hands together in a clap. Her brothers hissed in disgust while her father and Ashara balked in shock. Only Mellario looked upon her neutrally, and with no judgement on her face. The older woman seemed perfectly serene in this time of absolute chaos.

Oberyn immediately turned to her and began to storm off. Elia raised her hand to try and grasp his sleeve but he jerked it away and shot her a dark look. She felt anger bubble in her and called out for her brother.

Her younger brother gave her a dark look and took two long steps and stood directly in front of her. She could feel the heat radiate off his skin as he closed the distance between them. Elia turned her chin upwards and stared into those identical dark pools, so much like her own. She saw her reflection in her brother's eyes as he opened his mouth to speak. Elia hissed before he could even utter a word.

"I know what you are thinking, but you are wrong. I have made my decision and you must live with it." She said in a hard voice. Her brother's jaw tightened.

"Your sister is right, son. She needs your support now more than anything." Her father broke through the thick fog of anger and intensity. Elia inwardly thanked her father. Next to Elia, he was the only one who could persuade her brother to do anything.

Oberyn gave their father a pained look, and then swept his eyes over everyone in the room.

Elia saw the anger drain from his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. She reached for his hand and this time he allowed her to grasp it.

The sound of a clearing throat caused everyone to suddenly look at Adrielle, who had grabbed a parchment and quill.

"I will write to the king immediately. We will discuss our preparations for the journey in the morning, when we've all had a full night's rest and thinking clearly." Her mother directed the last word at Oberyn, who nodded quickly and dropped Elia's hand and briskly walked out of the solar and into the dark night.

"Oberyn if you leave me at this moment you will regret it for the rest of your days!" Doran came to Mellario and sat next to her on the chaise.

Later on that night, as she laid next to the sleeping Ashara, Elia prayed for sleep. She prayed to the Seven for sleep and reassurance that she had not just made an error in judgement. She agreed to marry a man she had never met, from a family she was, albeit distantly, related to.

She knew such luxuries like love and courting were far too grandiose for her, no, the gods must have other plans, surely they must.

Elia fell slowly into a deep slumber, dreaming of dragons and suns and indigo eyes.

( **A/N: The Shadow city is the large market city built on the walls of Sunspear. More info can be found on the ASOIAF wiki!**

 **Thanks**


	3. Chapter 3

A Month Later

The Elder Brother

Two nights before his sister left, Doran dreamed of nothing but their lives as children. In his dreams they were the same age, with Oberyn only a year behind. They spent long days in the Water Gardens and roaming the ruins of their ancestors. In his dreams Elia was healthy and dressed in his clothes as they wandered the streets of Sunspear.

Growing up was easier with them closer. He could be a child with them, and never feel as if he had the duty to protect them. They laughed and played games. Nothing mattered but the long days spent in the sun and the feel of the wind and sand on their faces.

In his dreams she never had to leave.

"I do not think Arianne understands what is going on." Doran whispered to his wife as they lay closely together in the darkness of their room. His hand laid on her stomach, the only indication of her pregnancy a small hardness in her abdomen.

Mellario snorted softly, "Of course not, she is still very much a babe. How could she understand?"

"I do not know how to explain it to her, she looks up to Elia." Mellario shifts slightly to look at him.

"We will explain it carefully, my love. She will understand when she is older." Her voice was soft and tired. He would get no further in the conversation that night.

Doran nodded at her words and tried to let sleep take him.

A cold feeling crept into his veins as his eyes closed. In his dreams he was running through the desert, searching for something he could not find.


	4. Chapter 4

The Day Of Departure

Lady Dayne

Ashara opened her eyes in the cool darkness of Elia's chambers. It had been nearly two moons since she had slept in her own chambers, instead sleeping next to Elia every night whispering among the sheets. It was like they could not help but spill every thought, every story they could think of before departing to the watchful walls of Kings Landing.

"Elia? Are you awake?" She whispered to the small form curled beside her. A small groan gave her the answer she was expecting.

"It's not even light out yet, let me sleep just a little longer." Elia mumbled. Ashara rolled her eyes and rose to stretch. The light outside was lightening from a dark blue to a lighter one with edges of yellow and orange.

She smiled to herself as she pulled the blankets off of her friend, " _A lady of Dorne must rise with the sun, and bow with it as it sets_." Elia shivered at the sudden flush of cool air on her skin, her thin shift doing nothing to help. Ashara could already pick out the bitter look on the princess' face.

"My mother has too much influence on you." She mumbled. Ashara smiled at her and walked to the wardrobe that housed the dress the princess would wear as she boarded the ship to take her away from Dorne, and the dress she would meet the Prince of Dragonstone in.

Ashara and Elia had picked it out themselves, wandering the streets of the market while head to toe in veils to hide their appearance. It was their last day of freedom, and they spent it entirely unknown.

"I wonder what my mother will say when she sees it." Elia whispered behind her. The dress was a deep red and tightened around the bodice, then subtly flowed out around the hips. It was edged in golden myrish lace all around both the sleeves and the neck-which plunged in a v-shape, something that the princess' mother would never approve.

"Thankfully she will not see it then." Ashara smiled and folded it gently and placed it in the bottom of the trunk. Elia pulled a robe on from the wardrobe and helped Ashara pack the rest of her dresses. It took no time, Elia was only taking six of her twenty gowns that she owned, for she was going to have many more made for her as Princess Regent and none of her gowns were thick enough for Kings Landing.

After they finished packing Elia shed her robe and reached for the dress that was laid out by her mother the previous night. It was deep red and thick, made of 3 layers of silk and wool underneath, with black fur lining the sleeves. Ashara eyed it with slight disdain. It was not a style Elia would wear, nor anyone who lived in Dorne. Elia turned towards Ashara and they both giggled at it. It was heavy but soft to the touch, it was ridiculous but it was a traveling gown.

Ashara helped Elia into it and laced it up as comfortably as she could. Elia snorted at her reflection in the looking glass when the dressing was done.

"Ashara, I actually look like I have a body!" Elia exclaimed as she turned around. Ashara smiled at her friend and pulled on her own dress, less extravagant but thick just the same.

The rest of the morning they finished packing everything else that they needed until the servants came to carry away their seven trunks. They broke fast with the Princess and Elia's family. Doran made light conversation, but it was Mellario and Oberyn who kept up most of the talk. Ashara watched from her place across from the small Arianne as Adrielle kept her mouth in a thin line as she ate her orange slowly. Elia was all warm smiles and made sure to touch each one of her family's hands. Ashara glanced at Lord Daeron, his hand was placed over his lady wife's hand, every so often he would rub circles into her wrist. A voice interrupted her staring:

"Are you delighted at the thought of seeing your brother again, Ashara?" Mellario asked as she handed Arianne a slice of an orange. Ashara smiled at the Norvosi and nodded.

"It has been too long since I've seen my brother, I think it was his four-and-tenth name day when last I saw him, so six years at least." Oberyn smiled at her.

"He is close with the prince as well." Oberyn noted. Elia looked lazily at her brother, his attempt a joke falling flat as the heavy emotion everyone was trying to ignore was beginning to choke them all.

"Your ship leaves soon, my dear." Lord Daeron said. It was the first think Ashara had heard Lord Daeron say all morning and it broke her heart. Ashara glanced quickly around the table and saw the life drain out of every member of the table save the babbling Arianne, and of course Mellario's ever present guard Areo Hotah who never showed any emotion at all. He stood behind the table with his eyes focused on the wall.

"Papa.." Elia whimpered. A voice inside Ashara her told her she was too old to sound this small, but Ashara knew she how she felt. Lord Daeron looked away and tightened his grip on his wife's hand.

"You are right, my lord. Elia and I must ready ourselves for the journey." Ashara spoke up and smiled tightly at her lady. Elia nodded and took a deep breath. She stood and walked over to kiss her father on the cheek. Her mother grabbed her hand with her free one and put it to her sunkissed cheek.

"Remember my daughter, you are a dornish, never let them forget you are a Martell." Elia nodded and kissed her mother's hand and cheek. Both Oberyn and Doran stood and walked with Elia and Ashara to the gates where the carriage was waiting with all of their things already prepared.

"You will give my love to the new babe will you not Doran?" Elia asked in a soft voice as she held her elder brother's hands in hers. Doran nodded and brought her close to him and whispered something in her ear that Elia could not here. Oberyn opened the door to the carriage and helped Ashara in first. She could feel his uneasiness in his hands.

"I am to accompany you to the docks, my dears." Oberyn said quickly, trying to hide his fear. It nearly worked.

Elia smiled at her younger brother and took his hand to climb into the carriage.

"Glad I am not rid of you yet little brother." She joked and Ashara saw a genuine smirk from the Viper.

"Not yet" She heard him whisper as he climbed in.

Soon they were leaving the walls of Sunspear and passing through the streets. All the while Elia had her eyes glued to the window as they passed every building, every market, even every hobble. Ashara watched as her closest friend tried to memorize every inch of her home and felt a deep sense of regret swell in her belly.

 _Please let this journey be easy. Please let it all be worth it,_ she prayed.

Ashara looked out her window and saw parts of the sea begin to show and the great sails of the ship that would take them on their voyage.

 _Brother, I am coming._


	5. Chapter 5

Brother Dear

Viper

Oberyn stepped out of the carriage and held his hand out for his sister's slender olive-toned fingers. Elia smiled at him and grasped it as she bent her head to step out. The sun was bright, nearly blinding the princess. Oberyn wished she had brought her veils with her but he knew she was trying to rid herself of their Dornish ways. Ladies in Kings Landing did not wear veils, especially royalty.

The Viper let go of her hand as soon as she placed her small foot onto the wooden board that led to the ship's deck. He fell in behind Ashara as she followed close behind his sister. Oberyn tried not to let his eyes wander down the Dayne's backside. Oberyn paused at the top of the walk up and, he felt an invisible barrier stop him from going any further.

"Brother?" Elia questioned, she had stopped as well and eyed his hesitancy. Oberyn locked his jaw.

"I can go no further." He replied, and inwardly flinched at how hoarse his voice sounded suddenly. He flinched again when Elia sharply huffed out.

"You do not even wish to see my chambers below deck to check their comfort or to interrogate the ship's captain on his expertise?" She sarcastically replied. Oberyn rolled his shoulders and flicked his eyes to the captain and then to Ashara's amethyst eyes and then to Elia's daring black ones.

"I must return to mother. Let her know that you have left safely." He said without missing a beat. Well trained soldier.

Elia bowed her head and nodded.

"Farewell brother dear." her voice choked out. Oberyn bowed at the waist at his sister, and then Lady Ashara next.

"When word is sent, we will set sail immediately." The prince promised, then turned on his heel. He could not stay on that ship any longer, for if he did he'd sail to King's Landing with her and never return.

Oberyn did not look back until he reached the carriage. He stopped and looked up at the yellow sails. He was blinded by the sun, for it shone so brightly on a day when he wished for rain. He wished for a storm to delay this vessel. Mother would have deemed it an omen and defied the Mad King. He found himself begging for that, begging the Gods for his sister to stay. Marry someone from Dorne, live her days in the water gardens with her children and his daughters.

The Gods are never fair.

A Week Later

"It is quiet here." Oberyn thought aloud as he pressed his fingers against the multitude of books as he walked slowly through the halls.

"It is a library, son, voices are not welcome in a room for thoughts." Lord Daeron's monotoned voice came from the far corner, a few paces ahead of Oberyn. Oberyn glanced at the scrolls on his desk and tried to read them from far away like he did when he was a child and his mother made he and Elia stay in their father's library for their lessons. He squinted his eyes and deciphered several words, 'princess', 'dragon's blood', 'son'.

"Your mother keeps all her letters, did you know this?" Daeron asked his youngest child as he set down his quill and set the scroll in front of him on a stack of several others.

"Yes."

"I found a very enlightening one the other morning, I thought perhaps you would like to read it." Oberyn watched as his father reached beyond the letter he had been looking at a moment ago and grab a different one, with lighter paper and handwriting that looked flourished and large. He took it from his father's aging hands with delicacy, for the paper looked so translucent he feared it might tear if he were to snatch it.

The prince scanned the delicate letter and felt his heart flutter with each passing word. He looked up at his father, who watched him with caution.

"The Queen wrote this? To mother?" Oberyn questioned. His father nodded. Oberyn felt fear and anger rise inside him, he could not believe his father could act so unperturbed after reading the Queen's words.

"How could you let Elia go after reading this? I do not understand!" Daeron raised his hand to silence his son. Oberyn bit his tongue and threw the parchment down. He no longer feared ruining the letter, he hated it at this moment.

"Your mother's decision came before this letter arrived from the Queen. I was not made aware of it until this morning. I only tell you because your mother has decided to send you and several other members of our family to the wedding once the raven arrives." Lord Daeron responded in the same monotone voice as before. His father never showed his anger, nor was Oberyn ever able to read his lord father's emotions.

"I was under the impression I was to go regardless." Oberyn replied as he felt himself searching for the plan his father was implying.

"You were, but as a brother, not as a spy. Stay, and keep an eye on the King and his dragon son. You are to stay as long as the King allows, but leave people behind. We are sending your cousins Darron and Callor, the King does not know them, disguise them as guards for your sister and let them stay." His father continued.

"If the King allows that. I have read the same letter as you and mother, the King has a distaste for our Dornish blood. He will not look kindly on more snakes in his castle." Oberyn spit out.

Daeron did not respond but stood instead.

"Try, as you must. Your sister will be surrounded by lions in that city. Rhaella mentioned Tywin and his anger at this slight. The Queen took a great risk at sending this letter to us, and she did so as a favor to your mother. We will not let your sister find herself in danger because of our failure as protectors." Daeron walked around his desk and put a hand on his son's shoulder and looked into his dark eyes.

"I trust you value your sister's life more than your own Oberyn, you will not allow her to be unprotected in a city as dangerous as King's Landing. She knows the danger that lies ahead of her, she is stronger than most ladies her age, but her health concerns your lady mother and I, I know you will not fail your sister." His voice held an edge, this was a threat. An unnecessary threat. Oberyn did not know his father, he was still a mystery to him.

"This would not have been necessary if mother had denied the Mad King his wish." Oberyn bit back. Daeron's eyes turned from confident to disappointed. It did not bother Oberyn. He would obey his lord parent's wish.

"You are young Oberyn, age will bring you wisdom to the actions of your parents. We did this with Elia's future in mind. She will birth the heir to the Seven Kingdoms."

Oberyn was in disbelief.

"You are sacrificing her life! She will be ripped apart by the Lannisters! You were there when the she was young and the maester's warned against her ever bearing children!" Oberyn raised his voice and pushed his father's hand off his shoulder. Lord Daeron suddenly grabbed his arm and held him still.

"You will bite your tongue Oberyn. You have been given a task and you will fulfill it as you are told. Your mother and I will not let your insolence and temper get in the way of your sister's future. Now leave!" His voice was loud and it struck a childish fear inside of Oberyn. In that moment he was reminded of a memory when that same tone was used:

 _'Oberyn!' his father's voice rang from the halls. Oberyn scurried his nine year old body under his large canopy bed and covered his ears from his father's deafening voice._

 _Suddenly he heard his door slam open and a hand grab his ankle. Oberyn screamed out in terror as he was dragged from beneath his bed. He was forced to stand as he kept his eyes closed tight in fear._

 _'Open your eyes.' Daeron demanded. Oberyn shook his head violently and felt a yank on his arm. Oberyn whimpered and shook his head again._

 _'If you do not open your eyes I will strike you and you will not leave this room for a fortnight.' Daeron threatened. Oberyn took a shaky breath and held back a sob. Martells did not cry._

 _Oberyn look his father in the eyes and saw the anger he knew he would see._

 _'Do you know what you did?' his father asked of him. Oberyn shook with fear and shook his head. Daeron narrowed his eyes._

 _'Do not lie to me.' Oberyn sniffed again and looked down at his feet. He tried to steady his breathing but it would not happen._

 _'I pushed my sister down. And she injured herself.' He replied in a small voice. Daeron shook his head._

 _'You injured your sister and then ran away when she needed help. Do you know what that means?' He asked in a calmer tone that made Oberyn second guess his reply. Was this a trap?_

 _Oberyn bit his lip and thought for moment. He looked down at his feet and searched for the answer his father wanted._

 _'I abandoned her.' He replied._

 _'Yes, you abandoned her. And that is unforgivable. You will stay in your room the rest of the day and think about what you have done.' His father stood and stepped away from Oberyn, who suddenly felt very small._

 _'No please father! I am sorry! I didn't mean to!' Oberyn begged and rushed to grab his father's shirt. Daeron put a hands on both his shoulders and pushed him away._

 _'It is not I whom you should be apologizing to son, it is your sister. Now sit here and deliberate what you will say to her. Your mother will fetch you when your time is up.' Daeron turned and left Oberyn alone in his room._

 _He turned and sat on his bed and stared at the door. And closed his eyes in thought._

Oberyn was his sister's protector. As Doran was both of their protectors. His parents had instilled that in him when was a boy. How could he let down the only reason for his living?

The prince stepped away and bowed to his father before saying:

"I will not fail you father, nor will I fail my lady mother." He responded, trying not to let his bitter tone bleed through. If his father caught it he did not let it known.

Lord Daeron nodded and returned to his desk.

"You will set sail the moment the raven arrives, go and prepare my son." He responded and looked back down at his parchment.

Oberyn walked swiftly to the entrance of his father's library in search of his brother. Perhaps Doran's wisdom would provide guidance on the plan that was forming inside of him.

 **(A/N: Proof reading? What's that? Sorry about the long update. Life is a bitch and I don't have time for anything. I also gave up on this story but got a stroke of inspiration tonight. Hope it's okay!)**


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